Accidental Bond How Sibling Connections Influence Adult Relationships [Paperback]

"A fascinating and informative read."

*The Boston Globe



"A RICH SOURCE OF FASCINATING MATERIAL about the complex realities of siblinghood and a valuable commentary on the impact that these little-studied relationships have upon our lives."

*The New Republic



"Many books have attempted to tackle the complex theme of sibling connection. But rather than look at the minutae of these relationships, journalist Susan Scarf Merrell examines the big issues that all siblings wrestle with in their own unique ways *in particular the Three Cs: Competition, Cooperation, and Comparison. What she discovered was that no matter what kind of relationship we now have with our siblings *close or distant, loving or hostile *our histories with them exert a profound effect on our current relationship with lovers, friends, coworkers, and our own children. Drawing on the most current research; the work of psychologists, psychiatrists, and family experts; and stories from brothers and sisters themselves, Merrell illustrates that through siblings, we come to know both the worst and the very best that lurks within each of us.



"Susan Merrell brilliantly illuminates how the peculiar mix of biology, history, and intimacy makes our attachments to siblings so essential to knowing ourselves."

*Mary Kay Blakely

Author of American MomCHAPTER ONE
 
 
 
The Accidental Bond
 
 
 
We do not select our beginnings. We are cast from Eden when one of a million sperm connects, in a random instant, with an egg; our creation occurs because two previously unacquainted genomes—without benefit of clergy or even a moment for mutual assessment—select one another and marry for life. Such a wonderful intricacy of circumstance joins gene to gene, supplies the nascent human with the parameters of its adult personality and physical form. At that moment lÃe