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The best-seller that helps you say: I just said 'no' and I don't feel guilty! Are you letting your kids get away with murder? Are you allowing your mother-in-law to impose her will on you? Are you embarrassed by praise or crushed by criticism? Are you having trouble coping with people? Learn the answers inWhen I Say No, I Feel Guilty, the best-seller with revolutionary new techniques for getting your own way.Manuel J. Smith (1934–2007) was a psychologist and a pioneer in the life-changing assertiveness training movement. He was the author of a number of self-help books, including the bestseller When I Say No, I Feel Guilty, which became a standard text used in assertiveness training in schools and the workplace.1
Our inherited survival responses;
coping with other people by
fight, flight, or verbal
assertiveness”
Almost twenty years ago, in college just after being discharged from the army, I met an honest, gutsy man. Joe was a young professor then and I was one of his students. He taught psychology when I met him, and still does. He taught it in a tough, opinionated, open style. He left his students none of their naïve notions about the discipline of psychology. He refused to give the expected explanations for morbidly interesting aberrations or even for mundane normalities of the human mind, behavior, or motivating spirit. In place of complicated theories on why we behave in a certain way, he stressed simplicity. For him, it was enough to describe how things worked psychologically, and that they did work, using simple assumptions, urging us to let it go at that. He held the firm, scholarly belief that 95 per cent of what is pandered as scientific psychological theory is sheer garbage and that it will be a long time before we really know our basic mechanics well enough to explain completely most of what we see.
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